r/videos 13d ago Gold 1 All-Seeing Upvote 1 Silver 3 Helpful 4 Wholesome 6 I'll Drink to That 1 Wholesome Seal of Approval 1 Platinum 1

Dave Chappelle on Jon Stewart | 2022 Mark Twain Prize

https://youtu.be/6pxmHX_gQuc
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u/TiredHorizon 13d ago

Hard for a coke guy to run as President? Our UK PM just had surgery on his nose.

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u/Lost_Mapper 13d ago

It was a joke. George W. Bush was a notorious coke user when he was younger.

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u/ChiliPipe69 13d ago

I guarantee you that Bill Clinton and JFK were into it also. To be honest, it’s just not that rare for people to like cocaine in their twenties

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u/Jedi_Outcast 12d ago

Jfk was on a lot of medications due to health problems.

He was in a lot of daily pain. So he was probably on a lot of painkiller

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u/TiberiusCornelius 12d ago

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u/footytang 12d ago

Dr. Feelgood

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u/El_Dentistador 12d ago

He’s the one they call Dr Feelgood?

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u/gravy_boot 12d ago

He’s the one that makes you feel alright

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u/ArcadianDelSol 12d ago

Back then, barbiturates and qualludes were considered legitimate medical treatments.

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u/anonymoussomeoneh 12d ago

I mean, barbiturates are still considered legitimate and effective treatment in some specific situations. Phenobarbital is the third line treatment for seizures and first line treatment for neonatal seizures. It's also used for detox from alcohol or Benzodiazepines.

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u/paid_4_by_Soros 12d ago

The 50's were like:

"Hey doc, my wife has thoughts and opinions."

"Here give her some of these, she's clearly hysterical."

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u/ZombieHoneyBadger 12d ago

Mommy's little helper

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u/Foul_Actually 12d ago

The Nobel prize for lobotomy goes to...

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u/TiberiusCornelius 12d ago

I mean that's true, but this doctor specifically wound up losing his license because of his cocktails when the New York Times exposed him in the early 70s. He was also doing his own supply of amphetamines at the same time as he was treating people. And he was known to prescribe barbs as well.

Man basically made a living getting rich people high

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u/Santiago2BuenosAires 12d ago

hey now! what the fuck man?!

lots of us in our 30s enjoy it as well.

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u/Pushmonk 12d ago

Let's just say that cocaine dealers in DC make a LOT of money.

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u/IamTheHWY 12d ago

when he was younger.

heh. heh. heh.

I still think "Shock and Awe" was an idea formulated after bumping a rail.

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u/Morgrid 12d ago

The Shock and Awe that was approved was like 10% the military asked for.

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u/felpudo 12d ago

We overran Baghdad in what, a couple days? What we didn't have was a plan for what to do after

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u/GetEquipped 12d ago

Obama admitted to using cocaine in college in his book "Dreams of my Father"

He wasn't addict, he never had to suck dick for coke, but he was honest that he tried a lot of drugs outside of heroin.

He also voices his own audiobook and there's a passage where he mulls over how someone can "borrow" a French fry with liberal use of the n-word.

It's actually kinda funny

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u/PoIIux 12d ago

Hearing Obama say that line about buying your own damn fries was something I never thought I needed until I got it

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u/ScottishRiteFree 12d ago

As if Trump wasn’t a coke guy 😆

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u/T1mac 12d ago

Trump's deal is Adderall, sniff....sniff. That's why he's up at 1:00 am tweeting and 4:00 am tweeting.

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u/exdigguser147 12d ago

It's Sudafed, he's a chronic Sudafed abuser

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u/[deleted] 12d ago edited 12d ago

[deleted]

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u/Nomandate 12d ago

“Mr trump wears a condom for oral”

“He told me I reminded him of his daughter”

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u/Thomas2311 12d ago All-Seeing Upvote Plus One

It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
Douglas Adams

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u/asaltandbuttering 12d ago

This is a restatement of the so-called metaphor of the Ship of State from Plato's Republic.

Edit: It is apparently older than the Republic!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ship_of_State

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u/webbphillips 12d ago

Athenians handled this problem by electing a new city council (boule) by yearly lottery, randomly selected from all citizens. Bring able to ostracize (banish) one citizen per year probably helped to discourage excessive corruption or malfeasance to those randomly chosen for that position.

What it did not solve was that voters are easily manipulated by good talkers with ambition and bad, selfish intentions. This remains unsolved.

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u/Blackdoomax 12d ago

I came to reddit to see some stupid memes, and now I'm reading some 2500 years old good shit in the morning. Thanks :)

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u/slappymcstevenson 12d ago

I think we want someone like Jon to be President, but he is just too sensitive for the job. Look at how ever President ages. Jon takes everything to heart, I think it would take years off of his life. But here’s the thing, I’ve wanted Jon Stuart to run for President for a long time. He represents what I deem to be a great American.

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u/Aitch-Kay 12d ago

You get bombarded with all the horrible shit that happens in America and around the world, and then get told you can't do anything about it. It either makes you a cynic, or it breaks you.

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u/Donkey__Balls 12d ago Heartwarming

I could see enough people writing him in for the democratic nomination that he actually runs. But he wouldn’t pull any punches shitting on the Democratic establishment either.

Honestly, we just need TDS with Jon Stewart back on the air, we don’t deserve it but we need it. Trevor Noah hasn’t done a bad job, but the simple reality is nobody’s going to listen to a foreign comic making fun of the absurdity of American domestic politics. I was in college during the Bush years and the start of the war, and I remember how Jon Stewart was such a powerful voice to snap people out of this cult-like mentality and actually realize that the war was a terrible idea.

It’s a very very difficult thing to make people change their minds and Jon Stewart is one of the only people I’ve seen who can effectively do it. And he does it with a lot of humor, while still being likable. In under 14 minutes he completely destroyed Tucker Carlson’s credibility for over a decade while making even Tucker’s diehard followers say “Wow, okay this Jon guy has a point.”

At this point Jon Stewart is like a retired superhero. No one powerful enough came along to replace him, and we need him back but we don’t deserve him back - and he’s earned his time to rest and be with his family. Part of me wishes he could make that sacrifice and bring it all back but at the same time we have no right to ask him.

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u/Hoisttheflagofstars 12d ago

...nobody's going to listen to a foreign comic making fun of the absurdity of American domestic politics...

John Oliver coughs nervously

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u/Donkey__Balls 12d ago

People who already agree with John Oliver watch him. And in general I’m one of those people, but I don’t deny that he caters to a very liberal audience. You don’t actually have an impact on the political landscape doing that because the only people you reach are the ones who already think the same way you do.

Jon Stewart had the unique ability to take the conservatives who worshipped Bush, get in front of them and make fun of Bush, and they’d laugh at his jokes and then listen to his point. The joke would be the wedge that he’d use to get past the walls and then he’d start getting people to question their own assumptions.

Someone like John Oliver could never go on Bill O’Reilly’s or Tucker Carlson’s show, confront them and actually win the audience over and get their fans listening to his side. Jon Stewart never just told jokes to appeal to the echo chamber. That wasn’t his style, and it really doesn’t achieve anything beyond making money from an already-receptive audience.

More importantly, Jon Stewart didn’t cater to the extremes on either side, he reached that critical mass of middle of the road people without strong political affiliation, the ones who are willing to change their minds every election, and actually got them to take a look at how absurd American politics had become. When you look at something like the 2008 election, Obama didn’t just win because he got more hardline blue voters to turn out than hardline red voters. He won because he shifted that critical center his way, basically appealing to people who were sick of the absurdity of the last eight years and wanted things to change. Middle America was finally seeing the absurdity and indignity of American politics and they wanted something better. I’m not crediting Jon Stewart with that single-handedly, but he had a huge role and getting people to pay attention and question the sanity of it all.

I have nothing against John Oliver but the fact that he caters to people that already believe the same things as he does simply means that he will not have any real influence on the political landscape. He’s successful enough and gets decent ratings but it’s nothing like what Jon Stewart did.

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u/AllysiaAius 12d ago

I mean, I think you have a point when it comes to the Bush years. But I think the political discourse shifted during the Obama years, and Job Stewart became "a known entity", and he stopped having that "middle of the aisle" appeal. He didn't cause it, but he largely became the center of his own echo chamber.

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u/lyam_lemon 12d ago edited 11d ago

In fairness to John Oliver, things have become dramatically more polarized since Stewart appeared on Fox News shows and won over a few moderate Republicans. Stewart couldnt do what he did then today either. Case in point, Stewart has a show today, on Apple TV, and he isn't winning over anymore people today than Oliver is.

Also, I dont see Oliver catering any more to the left than Stewart did. Stewart clearly favored the left, and Oliver has called out politicians and figures on the left many times. The issue is that the right has dragged so far to the right, that what was considered moderate right 15 years ago is now left of middle, and your not considered firmly in the right unless you espouse what would have been considered extremist politics back in Stewarts era

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u/junkyardpig 12d ago

Damn, that was a hell of a speech

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u/Rule1ofReddit 12d ago

I can’t even imagine being that articulate. These guys are legends.

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u/pantaloon_at_noon 12d ago

A lot of practice in front of crowds and definitely wrote and rehearsed that speech. Nice words and good on him to write a nice comedy bit/words of praise for his buddy

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u/aghastamok 12d ago

I thought it funny that he opened with "I didnt write anything for this..." and then did a tight 7.5 minutes with punchy callbacks and a strong finish.

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u/Gian_Doe 12d ago

TBF, he's been doing standup since he was a little kid. Dude has a timer in his brain, and he knew the points he wanted to bring up. He's done this countless times over his life, probably didn't need to rehearse it or write anything down. It's awesome to see professionals at work, they make it look so simple.

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u/Agent_Saucy 12d ago

That had a on the fly video... Truly amazing

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u/wxmco 12d ago

Dave Chappelle comes from a long line of highly-held story-tellers and public speakers (no joke), he mentions it somewhere in one of his specials.

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u/thebadguy01 12d ago

And not stutter or pause

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u/chewywheat 12d ago

It sure was. The fact he was able to weave in some good laughs and still keep it heartfelt is really nice.

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u/illmatic2112 12d ago

The points he makes about Jon cutting through the bullshit post 9/11, how we missed him sorely during the trump administration & "you are a cure for what ails our culture" were my fav parts. I need like a box set of TDS or something even if the material is only relevant for that period of time

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u/justatest90 12d ago

"I'm not here because I love John Stewart, I'm here because he loves me" is a brilliant fucking line

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u/Matt_McT 12d ago

Not sure anything demonstrates his love for others more than the speech he gave to congress on behalf of the 9/11 first responders.

https://youtu.be/_uYpDC3SRpM

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u/Historian-Constant 12d ago

Did the US end up honouring them or they’re still waiting?

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u/Matt_McT 12d ago

Congress ultimately passed the bill funding 9/11 first responders healthcare. This was the photo from that day when Mitch McConnel (one of the main people standing in their way) walked past Stewart after the bill passed.

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u/i-Ake 12d ago

God. This is a salve for my soul.

My friends and I went to the Rally to.Restore Sanity and/or Fear with him and Colbert in 2010... I had no clue how bad it could get. That was still a funny joke back then when we were 22. I was still dressed like Leeloo from the Fifth Element because we had been to a Halloween party the night before. It was great... one of those moments you remember. Still have my rally towel.

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u/MrPractical1 12d ago

I left from Illinois at 6pm the night before and drove through the night to attend that Rally. No regrets.

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u/Blizz36 12d ago

Got my rally monkey Reddit trophy from being there!

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u/SLCer 12d ago

They also just passed a bill to help soldiers who wre exposed to burn pits. Stewart backed that too and wouldn't you know, a lot of Republicans opposed it as well.

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u/Gingerbreadtenement 12d ago

He's basically teabagging McConnel in this pic. You just love to see it. Look at that grin.

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u/WOOKIExCOOKIES 12d ago

If that's not a shit-eating-grin, I don't know what is.

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u/jl_theprofessor 12d ago edited 12d ago

Can't believe that was three years ago. I think I cried watching that the first time.

Edit: The "Death to Tribeca" line is just ... it's the kind of line that makes you take pride in the nation.

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u/DroppedD94 12d ago

Could you please explain Death to Tribeca? I'm not American and didn't understand it

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u/jl_theprofessor 12d ago

Tribeca is a neighborhood in New York City. John says that the terrorists didn't attack shouting "death to Tribeca." They came as an attack on all America. Some senators had been trying to frame the attack as a New York problem, and John is trying to communicate that the attack on the Twin Towers was a blow to all Americans, not just New Yorkers.

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u/Tmoore188 12d ago edited 12d ago

I want to further explain this idea to anyone not familiar with the American sentiment being described here.

I’m from Indiana. I have about as much in common geographically with New Yorkers as people from Spain have with people from Poland. However, on 9/11, I watched my people die en masse. We were attacked.

I had very little in common with those people that died, but I believed in their right to live freely as they saw fit and prosper in the spoils of their efforts. That concept came under attack and I was privileged enough to watch a bunch of real life heroes clean up the mess and say “yeah, well fuck you. We’re not stopping.”

Jon Stewart standing up for the people who said “fuck you” was the most American thing I’ve seen in my lifetime.

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u/LNMagic 12d ago

The day a comedian defeated then-Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell. I just love this simple little photo. Even their attire speaks volumes.

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u/DroppedD94 12d ago

Wow thank you for the information. That's very powerful indeed.

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u/Jenetyk 12d ago

"They did their jobs, 18 years later... DO YOURS"

We never deserved such a empathetic, intelligent and articulate man. Many of my world views today are based on watching him as host of the Daily Show, and how to be pragmatic, yet compassionate.

I miss him in the public space.

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u/jr8787 12d ago

Wow. That was fucking powerful.

And yet, how fucking shameful. I had no clue about this but had to rewind to rehear the reference date… our government is so incompetent. Completely and utterly useless. Just like with veterans who get praised and exalted, but get health benefits denied by the GOP…it’s all empty words. These heroes are heroes in name alone.

I digress. Jon’s speech was amazing. Thanks for sharing.

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u/SneeKeeFahk 12d ago

Wow. Thanks for sharing that.

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u/Heequwella 12d ago

The run time of that video is 9:11. Props to ABC or JS for timing.

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u/Mr_Abe_Froman 12d ago

It's no mistake that Dave Chappelle calls Jon Stewart a "first responder" as a rhetorical device. He knows how much the phrase means.

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u/Fresh_C 12d ago

It works just as well as a puchline as it does a moving statement of friendship.

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u/Mr_Ted_Stickle 12d ago

sounds like a joke but has real meaning. Just like he said john can make a joke out of a good point. Same reason people giggle and smirk at the truth that they don’t want to face. It’s hard to face the truth, but it’s being put in a different perspective when introduced in joke form, which is easier to accept.

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u/Team_Braniel 12d ago

Really great speech. I can see a lot of those lines getting lifted for the Oscar's or other shows.

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u/ElCaz 12d ago

There were a lot of comedians and news comedy shows that tried to do it after him and failed. And honestly, I don't know if Stewart's Daily Show would have been successful in that era either.

Lots of comedians have talked about how the sheer shamelessness and volume of absurdity of American politics during the Trump admin was impossible to satirize.

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u/RabidBrush 12d ago

r/DailyShowTorrent for the entirety of your TDSwJS needs

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u/Dr_Wreck 12d ago

When he was retiring they did this thing where they aired all the daily show episodes in a row for like a week. I long for a website that just streams that same thing in a loop over and over like that toonami website.

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u/FloridaMan_69 12d ago

Used to be 10+ years ago you could just go to Comedy Central's website, pick the daily show and use a little calendar to pick literally any date that an episode ever aired and watch it with a couple little commercials in the normal ad breaks. Now you have to make an account to see most of the episodes and the layout is so awful you can't find anything old without knowing specifically what you're looking at. So dumb.

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u/sellyourselfshort 12d ago

And now there is another reason I wish justintv was still around.

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u/McMacpattywack 12d ago

There is a twitch channel I follow that does this for Who’s line. I’d love one for the daily show

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u/Cloaked42m 12d ago

We still need Jon Stewart to suck it up and run for President.

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u/rocksfly 12d ago

It would kill him, literally. He cares too much. The reality of being POTUS is you will inevitably be forced into making no-win decisions. No matter how hard you try to do the morally correct thing, there will reach a point where either the 1) isn't an obvious morally correct choice, or 2) the morally correct choice comes with dire consequences.

You have to be able to separate yourself from the job or it will eat you alive. Carter really struggled with that, and so would Jon Stewart. I think Obama did an admirable, if still imperfect, job at managing this balance.

Remember, politics is the art of the possible.

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u/CutterJohn 12d ago

Its fun to judge presidents for their warcrimes, and I'm sure there's plenty that are unjustifiable, but god I imagine a shit ton are just made with the president sitting there holding his head in his hands wracking their brain for a third option and hoping history doesn't judge them too harshly.

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u/bluEyedillusion 12d ago

Imagine if every day you faced both minor and major forms of the trolley dilemma. No thank you.

Not to mention you get blamed for every problem even when you have zero power over the solution to said problem.

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

Was it Carlin who said that those most qualified for office would never run because good people couldn’t bring themselves to be so corrupt?

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u/scuse_me_what 12d ago

This is such a beautiful observation, thank you for writing this.

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u/justinmillerco 12d ago

I’m more surprised Jon Stewart hadn’t been given the Mark Twain prize until now. He seems like the prototype for that award.

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u/howard416 12d ago

*archetype

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u/muad_dibs 12d ago edited 12d ago

Nah, Jon Stewart 2.0 is gonna be at minimum two times as funny.

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u/SoRedditHasAnAppNow 12d ago

I nominate u/howard416 for the Mark Twain award in 2023. Here are my list of credential for them:

  • knows the difference between prototype and archetype

  • 416 means maybe they're from Toronto, and that's cool

  • they taught me the definition of the word archetype (actually I Googled it, but I wouldn't have Googled it if I hadn't seen it written here)

  • has a large dong (probably)

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u/ebz37 12d ago

Can confirm he has a large dong.

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u/AFaceForRadio_20 12d ago

But is he from Toronto?

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u/Level69Warlock 12d ago

He shows up on massivecanadiandongs.com so it’s possible but i don’t have a premium account so i can’t see exactly where he lives

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u/SoRedditHasAnAppNow 12d ago

It's listed on his OnlyFans. He sells industrial cooling devices from there. It's not where he lives, but it is his workplace.

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u/SubstantialList2145 12d ago

Definition of prototype

1: an original model on which something is patterned : ARCHETYPE

2: an individual that exhibits the essential features of a later type

3: a standard or typical example

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u/gordo65 12d ago

I’m pretty sure Mark Twain is the prototype for that award. Or archetype, if you want to be pedantic.

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u/CampJanky 12d ago

Yet Mark Twain has been snubbed all these years. Shame.

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u/Deckardzz 12d ago

I miss Jon Stewart so much.

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u/Ryuzakku 12d ago

He has a show on Apple TV+ now that is basically The Daily Show.

It’s called “The Problem with Jon Stewart”

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u/Spinnetti 12d ago

Wow, that was really nice! very moving.

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u/yufkaa 12d ago

Heartfelt message

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u/Action_This_Day 12d ago

I miss the Daily Show so much

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u/Vandergrif 12d ago

I miss the Colbert report as well. I'm glad for his career, but a generic talk show is such a step down.

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u/Action_This_Day 12d ago

Daily show and Colbert back to back, those were the days.

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u/sasquatch606 12d ago

People have told me with a straight face that Trevor is better.

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u/Tinkerer221 12d ago

Trevor is respectable, definitely not even close to as good.

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u/gab3zila 12d ago

the issue i have with trevor and his writers are how much they flip flop on issues

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u/Hypno--Toad 12d ago

Honestly I also thought "The Opposition with Jordan Klepper" was too good to be cancelled. Particularly after that bit on black and white gun nut groups and their contrast and context.

Stewart started a dynasty.

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u/kingjoe64 12d ago

I'm sure pretending to be a conservative douche gets to you after a while though. I think he's probably a lot happier now even if we think the older material was better.

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u/jaytea86 12d ago

I'd vote for John Stewart for president without a doubt.

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u/Golferbugg 12d ago

But how about Jon Stewart?

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u/jaytea86 12d ago

Nah, I hear he's into coke.

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u/gravity_waves 13d ago

Maybe he didn't write a speech but he sure as hell had an outline ... that was beautiful to watch

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u/analest-analyst 12d ago

"it usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech."

Mark Twain

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u/KesEiToota 12d ago

This guy is so good, he should be out there giving awards

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u/thrillhouse3671 12d ago edited 12d ago

I'm sure he wrote "I didn't write this speech" into his speech.

There are comedians that seem like they are bumbling through their entire act (Louis CK is the first one that comes to mind for this style), but every pause and awkward laugh/smile is absolutely planned.

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u/pipsdontsqueak 12d ago

Boris Johnson has an entire bit he does where he starts pretending he hasn't prepped before he even gets on stage.

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u/blindsdog 12d ago

There's a pretty great story about that: https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/my-boris-johnson-story

Johnson is clearly very intelligent. Shame he seems to have no morals.

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u/jl_theprofessor 12d ago

It's exactly why I don't like the Boris/Trump comparisons. One of those guys is clearly highly intelligent.

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u/Searchlights 12d ago

Of course it was written. But his opening set a wonderful candid tone to a deeply personal reflection on a life and career he admires. Dave is a masterful performer.

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u/Lurker117 12d ago

Dave is such a pro he would never ad lib a speech for a person he respects so much. Every line of that was thoughtfully planned and masterfully executed to honor his friend.

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u/diamondpredator 12d ago

Yea that was written lol. He had a nice bookend just like a lot of his stand up.

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u/billwashere 12d ago

Yeah … that was really moving and thought provoking. I cannot imagine what it must feel like to sit there and watch someone share that much emotion and admiration towards anybody let alone me.

And yes he was sorely missed during Cheeto Benito. If Mr. Stewart ever stuck his toe into politics I would do everything in my power to help him as much as I possibly could. He is EXACTLY what this country would and does need.

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u/kmlaser84 12d ago

If he didn’t prepare a speech, the Video guy needs more props for having those clips ready to go...

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u/abhi91 12d ago

Wish I gave my best man speech like this goddamn

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u/Graphics_Nerd 12d ago edited 12d ago

Key is to focus on being sincere and share personal stories that connect you with whoever you’re giving the speech about. Then sprinkle in little bits of humor so the tone is kept light and you can keep peoples attention, throw things in there that are true but unexpected. The other thing to do is practice it out loud a lot.

When my buddy got married I was his best man “I’ve known Doug since 3rd grade, we grew up across the street from one another, we played on the same sports teams, we were even roommates after we graduated high school. And I’m honored to be his today as his best man. When Doug and first I met I knew deep in my heart…I hated his guts.“ the went into why and how I was wrong about who in ways that positively reflected who he actually is.

Dave isn’t doing a stand up routine he’s sharing a heart felt piece of their history.

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u/WrenBoy 12d ago

Also respect your audience and don't be too fucking long.

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u/Jmersh 12d ago

Dave Chapelle is an orator more than he is a comedian. He can hold thousands of people in the palm of his hand and they will hang on every word.

Sometimes he goes for minutes at a time without a laugh which is unheard of in comedy, but nobody ever loses interest. You know the punchline is coming, but you don't care how long it takes to get there. That is what it means to be an orator.

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u/Angryatthis 12d ago

In one of his Netflix specials he says what the punch line is going to be and then still proceeds to catch everyone off guard in a natural way with the twist of it. Next level.

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u/thebadguy01 12d ago

It’s always dead silent when he speaks

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u/Waiting4theAsteroid 12d ago

I suspect he may have been lying about the not preparing a speech part

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u/Dr_Colossus 12d ago

It wasn't written word for word, but he definitely had an outline of stories he wanted to cover. It's his job to talk. Lawyers are similarly good at talking off the cuff.

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u/joshuav85 12d ago

You know a man is great when Chappell didn’t even need to bring up all the lobbying Jon Stewart did for the first responders affected by the harmful dust clouds during 9/11 that cause many to become very sick or die many years after the attacks. Beautiful speech.

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u/Pixelated_ 12d ago

Wasn't Dave referencing that when he kept referring to Jon as his "first responder"?

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u/mredrose 12d ago

I got that vibe too.

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u/AverageGuyGreg 12d ago

Dave is reiterating that first responders speak with actions, not just words, and he is acknowledging that Jon is more than just a man who delivers jokes and says important things, he acts on them too.

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u/joshuav85 12d ago

Now that you mention it yes. Apologies. Lol I should’ve linked the two.

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u/smartlog 12d ago

In case you guys didn't get it from the video. Jon Stewart is a really good human being.

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u/Unasked_for_advice 12d ago Helpful Wholesome Starry

I would vote for John Stewart for President

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u/genericnewlurker 12d ago

After seeing him fight in Congress for the 9/11 first responders, I know not only that he could do the job but, potentially be one of the best presidents in history. This country is in no way deserving of a leader as good as he would be, but is in desperate need of such a person at the top.

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u/Cum_on_doorknob 12d ago

Landslide victory for Jon Stewart. Easily.

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u/shitlord-1-1 12d ago

I just wouldn't want to throw that much hard work on the guy. You know he would try his best.

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u/Coal_Morgan 12d ago

Every President good or bad has a horde of failures. Many if not most of those failures include a toll paid in the bodies of others.

Jon Stewart would feel every single one. It would burn in his soul and he's so empathetic, such a good person I think it would destroy him.

I could never wish a Presidency on such a man but if he got it, he'd always try to do his best and it would make him better than most.

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u/InfiniteBlink 12d ago

At this point we're only gonna elect celebrities... I'd throw my hat in for Stewart/Rock ticket

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u/TommyTheCat89 12d ago

Chris Rock or The Rock?

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u/Appropriate-Proof-49 12d ago

Yeah. Whatever.

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u/blindsdog 12d ago

Shit its the American VP. Make it an actual rock, no one would notice.

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u/uglydavie 12d ago

As long as it's not Kid

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u/rapzeh 12d ago

No, a simple pet rock.

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u/Johannes_Keppler 12d ago

So, another Mike Pence?

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u/Darklicorice 12d ago

Probably not The Rock.

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u/passengerv 12d ago

That's a good friend right there.

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u/Unnecessary_Timeline 12d ago

Still get whiplash every time I see Pete Davidson and Kim Kardashian next to eachother lol

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u/PM-ME-YOUR-NIPNOPS 12d ago

I had more whiplash seeing them next to Steve Carell and his wife Nancy

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u/Respectable_Answer 12d ago

"why you gotta make us hang out with Kim, Pete?"

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u/roosters 12d ago edited 12d ago

She looks like a perpetual allergic reaction. It’s so charmingly befuddling that so many young women aspire to that look. Everything is swollen and puffy and you can literally see grooves carved into her neck where the skin has been cut and pulled and stitched tighter underneath. Then there’s the eyes... lifeless eyes... black eyes... like a doll’s eyes...

Fer srsly tho, how does anyone find her persona or appearance attractive?

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u/Jlloyd83 12d ago edited 12d ago

It's surprising how quickly you get used to talking to people with those lifeless botox faces. I went to a party a couple of weeks ago with lots of people who'd had bad plastic surgery and it becomes normalised when you're around enough people who are doing it.

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u/masochistmonkey 12d ago

I worked in a luxury hotel spa for years and we got so many middle-aged women with those rubber doll faces and I couldn’t tell them apart. They all looked like the same person to me.

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u/thehappyheathen 12d ago

I feel like there are plastic surgeons who have a wall of "flash" faces, like the flash that tattoo shops have. You can get a custom tattoo, or you can just point to the pretty tiger. Cosmetic surgery seems the same. There are like, 3 or 4 generic faces that most people pick from and it ends up really uncanny for the rest of us.

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u/spudddly 12d ago

Not just normalised, they know that "worked on" look is unnatural but it's also one of the few remaining signs of real status/wealth when half of the middle class is now rocking Versace bags.

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u/not_right 12d ago

Beguiling? Are you sure?

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u/thedinnerdate 12d ago I'll Drink to That

He tried to purple prose but flew too close the sun.

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u/Paradigm6790 12d ago

Ever see a term you don't know and google it only to find it's a term that you've wanted in the past but couldn't find.

Such a satisfying feeling. Purple prose.

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u/DaytonaDemon 12d ago

It’s beguiling that so many young women aspire to that look

Beguiling? It enchants you?

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u/HungryDust 12d ago

I think they meant bewildering

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u/NietzscheIsMyCopilot 12d ago

or befuddling

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u/cuteintern 12d ago

Enchanting like a siren.

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u/The_Pandalorian 12d ago

It's a shame. She was genuinely beautiful back in the day. I met her briefly circa 2009/2010 and two things struck me: 1) she's tiny, like super short and 2) she was way more beautiful in person than she was on TV/in pictures.

Now... Yeesh.

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u/Vandergrif 12d ago

she's tiny, like super short

bitch, is you the hobbit?

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u/The_Pandalorian 12d ago

LMAO, how have I not seen that?

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u/paone00022 12d ago

This is her in 2006 back before most of the surgeries were done.

She went from girl next door look to plastic doll look.

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u/The_Pandalorian 12d ago

Yup. She was much better looking in person than that photo, too.

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u/JudgmentalOwl 12d ago

"Perpetual allergic reaction" is a fine and rare insult indeed.

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u/pinegreenscent 12d ago

Human doll is what she's going for

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u/humblepotatopeeler 12d ago

only dave chappelle can make an 8 minute speech feel like it was 3 minutes.

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u/Archkingz 12d ago

Wow that was a great fucking video.

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u/electriclala 12d ago

Wow what a speech. Amazing.

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u/maddenmcfadden 12d ago

I'd love to see Jon run for President. Imagine having compassion and sanity in the White House.

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u/Someredditusername 12d ago

Got a little weepy watching this, if I'm honest

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u/indominus_ed 12d ago

I’d vote for him in a heartbeat.

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u/BigReed99 12d ago

Not sure if it was picked up, but Dave purposely used the term First Responder because of Jon Stewart’s dedication to helping the first responders of 9/11. It’s a long story, but he was paramount in ensuring they were taken care of due to how severe the situation was. And those that survived the response often have severe medical issues.

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u/Lil_spacedock_P 12d ago

Based on the comments I guess I'm the only one here to actually watch this clip. That was a very kind tribute to Jon Stewart. Well done

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u/PUMPEDnPLUMP 12d ago

I'd scoop out both my eyeballs with a rusty spoon for Jon to be President

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u/reelznfeelz 12d ago

Oh I know. He could win too. It would be like Arnold ran. He’s about the only celebrity I’d want to see in there. Maybe David Mitchell, but he’s not a citizen.

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u/SomeoneBetter 12d ago

David Mitchell

I would say most Americans have no idea who David is, and secondly he would have absolutely no will to be our president

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u/kymri 12d ago

Honestly, I would want him to be the President of the United States solely for the truly EPIC rants we would be likely to get in place of the State of the Union addresses.

Given the kind of rant he can work up for the seemingly-meaningless irritations, I can only imagine what he'd have to say after a year of being in charge of the Executive branch.

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u/TheSystemZombie 12d ago

Chance would be a fine thing

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u/misterguydude 12d ago

Fantastic!

He really was the guiding light through dark times. Run for President. Fuck it!

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u/YouIsIgnant 12d ago

I would vote for him

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u/cheekymonkey100 12d ago

John Stewart for prez!

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u/gravywayne 12d ago

Jon Stewart for President

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u/FrvncisNotFound 12d ago

I love both of these people.

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u/justawaterisfine 12d ago

I was just graduating high school when the daily show became my source of news and really helped me get a grasp on the world, and it was always parallel to humor and even art, while the doom and gloom news agencies used only fear and anger. Was an easy choice

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